I used to think that surrendering to something bigger than myself was a sign of weakness. I was raised as a Mormon and saw a lot of people in my church “putting their life in the hands of God,” yet they seemed complacent and lazy.
It felt as if they wanted God to do everything for them. They didn’t want to be collaborators with a Higher Source, they wanted to go limp like a doll, their lives being pulled along by puppet strings.
However, somewhere in my heart it felt right to be lived by something greater than myself. Source. God. The Universe. Whatever you want to call it.
Most of us feel on some level that there is something greater at work than just our own conscious will. We realize that if we were put in charge, things would quickly fall apart.
Imagine your conscious mind being put in charge of running and keeping track of all the systems in your body. Your heartbeat, breath, nervous system, brain function, lymphatic system—the list is staggering.
Micro seconds after assuming command, you’d be dead.
I think a lot of us understand that. Something bigger is living us. But we don’t want to give up our control. We think we know what’s best. And what about Free Will, dammit?
Not wanting to be a puppet is how I’ve felt for the last 15 years as I’ve questioned “Let go and let God.” And let’s be honest, questioning that complacency was a very good thing helped me move beyond apathy.
But over time I’ve realized how much richer my life is the more I expand rather than contract.
When I work toward a purpose that is bigger than me, that encompasses the world, I feel more joy, more inspiration. I tap into a well of energy that feels unquenchable. When I choose to earn money for more than my personal needs — for those of my family and for the world — my actions feel more profound and purposeful. When I take great care of my body because I know I’ll be able to better serve my community because of it, I feel drawn to being impeccable with myself.
I’ve been sustained by the depth accessed in expansion.
Yet, there is still something more than expanding to the needs of others. Something deeper that beckons me to explore.
Yes, there is something beyond living for the sake of service. I’m slowly getting to know this new terrain. It involves surrendering at a deeper level than I’m comfortable with. It’s terrifying, honestly.
And yet, when I do surrender and let this “something greater” move through me, my actions are drenched in integrity and depth of purpose that often shocks me.
I am moved to do, say or sense exactly the right thing, perfect for that moment.
Trusting this source I’ve found does not result in me being dissolved or destroyed.
It feels more like coming home.
Allowing Source, God, Consciousness to guide your life and work doesn’t have to mean complacency. It can be the key to unlocking your deepest heart’s purpose.